Saturday, February 14, 2004
Sometimes You Just Can't Change People
For anyone with a lot of time on their hands and in the mood for reading, they can read an example of the cost of freedom.
I've sometimes thought that it's been a real waste, running for as many years as I have been . . . and deciding not to coach. I've led athletes into battle before. There's no reason I couldn't do it again. But then . . . that's not true. There's something different about being one of the hunted . . . and being someone who is only allowed to watch, comment, inspire . . . yet in the end, merely hope.
That, and, "What little control coaches have!" as the coach in my novel, STFL, despairs. If I compared writing to coaching, I could state a lot of differences. They are similar in at least one way, though -- you're trying to reach people, and you can never be sure how it'll turn out. You may end up missing everyone. You may hit dead-on with the ones you mean to . . . but then alienate just who you didn't mean to alienate.
So why have I chosen the selfish route? Why choose to write novels no one will read rather than take an opportunity to affect young'ns lives? At least with writing, I can control what I want to control. The book can suck, but as long as I like it -- who cares? I wrote the book I wanted to write. Goal accomplished.
Coaching? You're dealing with people, reality. No matter how hard you try, it can all go to hell. "Your weapon, his kill." Or as Rhodes says in Day of the Dead, "It can all be undone in a matter of minutes."
And we can all sympathize, can't we? That feeling, after it's over -- that knowing that things can never be the same -- that "irreparable" understanding. As Dylan put it, "It's alright, ma (I'm only bleeding)". Or more directly:
You've got friends who believe in you, Joe. There's a reason tracks are ovals. Keep running.
I've sometimes thought that it's been a real waste, running for as many years as I have been . . . and deciding not to coach. I've led athletes into battle before. There's no reason I couldn't do it again. But then . . . that's not true. There's something different about being one of the hunted . . . and being someone who is only allowed to watch, comment, inspire . . . yet in the end, merely hope.
That, and, "What little control coaches have!" as the coach in my novel, STFL, despairs. If I compared writing to coaching, I could state a lot of differences. They are similar in at least one way, though -- you're trying to reach people, and you can never be sure how it'll turn out. You may end up missing everyone. You may hit dead-on with the ones you mean to . . . but then alienate just who you didn't mean to alienate.
So why have I chosen the selfish route? Why choose to write novels no one will read rather than take an opportunity to affect young'ns lives? At least with writing, I can control what I want to control. The book can suck, but as long as I like it -- who cares? I wrote the book I wanted to write. Goal accomplished.
Coaching? You're dealing with people, reality. No matter how hard you try, it can all go to hell. "Your weapon, his kill." Or as Rhodes says in Day of the Dead, "It can all be undone in a matter of minutes."
And we can all sympathize, can't we? That feeling, after it's over -- that knowing that things can never be the same -- that "irreparable" understanding. As Dylan put it, "It's alright, ma (I'm only bleeding)". Or more directly:
You've got friends who believe in you, Joe. There's a reason tracks are ovals. Keep running.
