Monday, September 20, 2004
Random Thoughts on a Sunny Packer Game
- If you've never been to Lambeau Field, the thing you'll carry with you after the towering statues of Curly and Vince, the lush interior, or the game, is the tiny seat sizes. In the winter, being pressed body-to-body on those cold metal bleachers helps. Nothing like body heat to keep one going. But on a warm, late summer day -- with sun enough to redden one half of this face -- it doesn't work so well. I've got it down pretty well: I crouch forward. Most people sit back and just try to hold their knees in. Still, I wonder how anyone weighing more than 200 lbs makes it through a game.
- There's something about being in a crowd that big that gets me thinking of writing. I've been struggling like hell to write this female character in my book. And thanks to the Packers seating me in back of a brunette who's the perfect age of my character, I now know how to describe her (the back of her, anyway).
- It's always best when they introduce the offense, simply because we don't have a defense worthy of introduction. Usually, they introduce each player, the crowd shouts, and then the player comes out and does some stupid dance or jog. But when they get to #4, the crowd goes so loud, and Brett's so jacked for it, that the camera can't even focus on him. He spends no time waiting. Before they even call his name, he's sprinting out of the tunnel, ready to go. There are better quarterbacks, but there's no one else I'd want on my team.
- There's this crabby, old guy who always sits in back of us. Some of his one-liners from yesterday:
When I sat down and put my sister's seat down next to me (you can rent these little seats to put down on the bleachers that makes the sitting experience about .159862473569% better):
"Oh, boy. Another one of those darn-it-all seats to sit behind."
To the people in front of us, who tried to start "the wave" in the fourth quarter:
"You don't do 'the wave' when we've got the ball, dummy!"
When people stood up to watch a big play, because everyone in front of them stood up:
"Down in front! Down in front! I didn't come to standing-room-only!"
To the guy in front of me, who lit up a cig:
(Walking down into my row and grabbing the guy by the shoulder): "Put it out, buddy! There's no smoking in the stands! You put it out, or I'll get security to put it out for you!" (Man puts out cig. Security still escorts the guy out.)
- They had more than 100 alumni from past teams there at halftime. And when they introduced each player, the fans gave some polite cheering. It was good to see some of the old guys from the 80s. But most of the guys were way before my Packer-watching days. The one truly notable feature in the whole ceremony was when they got to Bart Starr. They introduced him, and he walked forward like anyone else. But the crowd exploded in cheers and clapping. Parents pointed to their kids to look at the big screen. Bear fans put down beers and clapped. It lasted more than a minute. And for that minute, it felt more important than halftime.
- Overall, I give credit to the Bear fans. They were polite, kind, only slightly obnoxious, and for the most part friendly. It's clear why this isn't the rivalry the Packers-Vikings rivalry is. We may not like the Bears, but at least we can stand their fans. There's more honesty in this rivalry. Bears fans knew their team got a rare one yesterday. Packers fans knew their team was overrated, and has little chance to get beyond a first-round play-off game, if that.
- As my sister put it: "What is up with Packers games and ass-grabbers?" A very good question that I have no answer for. But she's right. Almost every game I go to, in the row in front of me, there's a husband who's gotta have his hand on him wife's ass for half the game. Sometimes it's like the guy in front of me yesterday, who occasionally slapped his wife's ass. Sometimes it like the guy in front and to the left of me yesterday, who kept digging in his wife's pocket (not that there was anything in there, mind you). It's just nothing anyone wants to see. Do they think there's no one in back of them like 2 inches away?
- I sat next to this cute little girl, and I never saw her face because she had this Packer hat on that was three times too large for her head. She also had a Packer jersey on that was so big that her body was simply lost underneath it. She was a "special" kid, and every now and then she'd scream out, "Come on, Brett! Come on, buddy! Throw a touchdown!" (Of course they were 80 yards from the end zone at that point.) She had this sort of lisp, so every now and then, people in front of her would turn around, surprised. Nobody was mean to her, they were just curious. Then, at one point in the fourth quarter, right after Brett threw his 2nd interception, I got up and screamed, "Oh, shoot me in the head, why don't you?" The little girl gets up and screams in her little lispy voice, "Come on, you fockers!" I look over at her, shocked. Then I look up at her dad. Her dad looks down at her and says, "Way to tell 'em, Sweetie."
- There's something about being in a crowd that big that gets me thinking of writing. I've been struggling like hell to write this female character in my book. And thanks to the Packers seating me in back of a brunette who's the perfect age of my character, I now know how to describe her (the back of her, anyway).
- It's always best when they introduce the offense, simply because we don't have a defense worthy of introduction. Usually, they introduce each player, the crowd shouts, and then the player comes out and does some stupid dance or jog. But when they get to #4, the crowd goes so loud, and Brett's so jacked for it, that the camera can't even focus on him. He spends no time waiting. Before they even call his name, he's sprinting out of the tunnel, ready to go. There are better quarterbacks, but there's no one else I'd want on my team.
- There's this crabby, old guy who always sits in back of us. Some of his one-liners from yesterday:
When I sat down and put my sister's seat down next to me (you can rent these little seats to put down on the bleachers that makes the sitting experience about .159862473569% better):
"Oh, boy. Another one of those darn-it-all seats to sit behind."
To the people in front of us, who tried to start "the wave" in the fourth quarter:
"You don't do 'the wave' when we've got the ball, dummy!"
When people stood up to watch a big play, because everyone in front of them stood up:
"Down in front! Down in front! I didn't come to standing-room-only!"
To the guy in front of me, who lit up a cig:
(Walking down into my row and grabbing the guy by the shoulder): "Put it out, buddy! There's no smoking in the stands! You put it out, or I'll get security to put it out for you!" (Man puts out cig. Security still escorts the guy out.)
- They had more than 100 alumni from past teams there at halftime. And when they introduced each player, the fans gave some polite cheering. It was good to see some of the old guys from the 80s. But most of the guys were way before my Packer-watching days. The one truly notable feature in the whole ceremony was when they got to Bart Starr. They introduced him, and he walked forward like anyone else. But the crowd exploded in cheers and clapping. Parents pointed to their kids to look at the big screen. Bear fans put down beers and clapped. It lasted more than a minute. And for that minute, it felt more important than halftime.
- Overall, I give credit to the Bear fans. They were polite, kind, only slightly obnoxious, and for the most part friendly. It's clear why this isn't the rivalry the Packers-Vikings rivalry is. We may not like the Bears, but at least we can stand their fans. There's more honesty in this rivalry. Bears fans knew their team got a rare one yesterday. Packers fans knew their team was overrated, and has little chance to get beyond a first-round play-off game, if that.
- As my sister put it: "What is up with Packers games and ass-grabbers?" A very good question that I have no answer for. But she's right. Almost every game I go to, in the row in front of me, there's a husband who's gotta have his hand on him wife's ass for half the game. Sometimes it's like the guy in front of me yesterday, who occasionally slapped his wife's ass. Sometimes it like the guy in front and to the left of me yesterday, who kept digging in his wife's pocket (not that there was anything in there, mind you). It's just nothing anyone wants to see. Do they think there's no one in back of them like 2 inches away?
- I sat next to this cute little girl, and I never saw her face because she had this Packer hat on that was three times too large for her head. She also had a Packer jersey on that was so big that her body was simply lost underneath it. She was a "special" kid, and every now and then she'd scream out, "Come on, Brett! Come on, buddy! Throw a touchdown!" (Of course they were 80 yards from the end zone at that point.) She had this sort of lisp, so every now and then, people in front of her would turn around, surprised. Nobody was mean to her, they were just curious. Then, at one point in the fourth quarter, right after Brett threw his 2nd interception, I got up and screamed, "Oh, shoot me in the head, why don't you?" The little girl gets up and screams in her little lispy voice, "Come on, you fockers!" I look over at her, shocked. Then I look up at her dad. Her dad looks down at her and says, "Way to tell 'em, Sweetie."
