Tuesday, September 06, 2005
Pulling Off the Blanket
It's time to pull off this security blanket we Milwaukeeans have wrapped ourselves in. I hear it all the time, and I'm tired of it. It's a lie. And there's a time to comfort oneself with lies. That time is not now. Let's be clear:
ATTENTION MILWAUKEE--
Stop saying Chicagoans and/or Illinois folk are bad or crazy drivers. The facade is over. WE ARE JUST AS BAD AS THEY ARE. There was time when I would jump onto the freeway system here and run into the occasional asshole driver. I yearn for such times. First, allow me to define "asshole driver":
1.) Only he/she matters.
2.) Speed better be 20 over the limit or get out of their way.
3.) What turn signals?
4.) This shoulder is for passing.
5.) Yellow means accelerate.
6.) What blind spot?
There is no more "occasional asshole driver". There is ALWAYS an asshole driver present. Often, there are MANY asshole drivers on the road. WE are the bad, crazy drivers. We are the assholes. Stop pushing the onus onto our fellow assholes to the south.
ATTENTION MILWAUKEE--
Stop saying Chicagoans and/or Illinois folk are bad or crazy drivers. The facade is over. WE ARE JUST AS BAD AS THEY ARE. There was time when I would jump onto the freeway system here and run into the occasional asshole driver. I yearn for such times. First, allow me to define "asshole driver":
1.) Only he/she matters.
2.) Speed better be 20 over the limit or get out of their way.
3.) What turn signals?
4.) This shoulder is for passing.
5.) Yellow means accelerate.
6.) What blind spot?
There is no more "occasional asshole driver". There is ALWAYS an asshole driver present. Often, there are MANY asshole drivers on the road. WE are the bad, crazy drivers. We are the assholes. Stop pushing the onus onto our fellow assholes to the south.
